“I’m 65. If Gloria wants to be surprised, she should buy a box of Cracker Jacks.”
While Jay has struggled with his son’s homosexuality throughout the show, he still tries to help his best friend, Shorty, come out of the closet. Whether Shorty wants to or not.
Jay Pritchett’s Episode Guide
And One To Grow On.
The holidays are over (oh heyyy 2014), and Modern Family is back — along with Andy (Adam DeVine)!
The Old Man and the Tree.
Christmas episodes are the best (second only to Halloween episodes). This one is pretty hodge-podgy, and it takes place on Christmas Eve, rather than actual Christmas, plus there’s not technically a ton of Christmas-y stuff, but I’ll take it.
The Big Game.
Really, guys? Another filler episode? Two in a row? Mreh. “The Big Game” focuses mostly on a football game, coached by Cam, played in part by Manny, and announced by Luke, so, you know, it’s relevant.
Cam and Mitchell are farming it up, while Jay and Claire attend a business seminar/skeleton convention and Phil almost single-handedly destroys all the groundwork he’s laid with his father-in-law. This might have been the weakest episode of the season — they could have done a lot with the farm thing, if they had cut one of the other subplots short. It’s hard to say which one, because none of them were all that great, but they all had at least one bright spot (aka Saving Grace).
A Fair To Remember.
Anyway… The family ends up at the local fair on Claire and Phil’s 20th anniversary, and the usual Pritchett-Dunphy-Tucker-Delgado shenanigans ensue, complete with snow-cones, overly-stuffed animals, balloons, and emasculating carnival games. There might even be a bit of unlawful imprisonment.
Fred Willard is back as Phil’s (now-single) dad Frank, Adam DeVine begins his recurring role as Gloria’s new manny, Peri Gilpin (aka Roz from Frasier) pops in for a quickie with Frank, and Nathan Lane is back as Pepper, this time trying to plan Cam and Mitchell’s wedding.
The Late Show.
Though the episode title might suggest otherwise, the gang does not sojourn to The Late Show and cause mayhem. Rather, this episode focuses on the shenanigans causing all the grownups to be late for a dinner Jay had to pull a million strings to reserve.
Last night Modern Family hit the 100th-episode milestone with a series of revelations: Luke is great at soccer! Jay is great at Words With Friends! Gloria doesn’t know what Jay really looks like!
This week on Modern Family, Phil discovers just how terrible he would be at having an affair, Gloria worries she’s living out the plot to The Omen, “Haley’s doing something for money in the basement”, and Mitchell and Cam try to plan their wedding using only businesses with puns in their name.
Suddenly, Last Summer.
Fresh off yet another Emmy win, Modern Family kicks off its fifth season with a two-parter.